It has taken me a while to post again because of my good friend, moral conviction. I'll start this post by telling you what I have learned. . . When life throws a curve ball at you, typically you stick with what is comfortable, not what is right. To clarify, I have been doing well and dieting well for a couple weeks, I had even lost 15 pounds! Yaaaay. Than life threw me a curve ball (also called 8am Spanish class.) Now this isn't any Spanish class. . . this is Spanish class ruled by a tyrant. I am suppose to allot 6 hours a day to my Spanish duties, but that makes my days seem tough. Lets see here, 2 hours of class, 6 hours of homework, 8 hours of work, 1 hour of Jesus, 1 hour of working out and 3 hours eating. . . that puts me at 21 hours of work to do a day and 3 hours of sleep. I can't believe it took me 2 weeks to figure out I can't do that.
So this is the point where I blame me falling off the weight loss train on Spanish, but I can't. I have tried putting this on everything else but I simply can't. Just how Adam tried to put the fall on first Eve and than God; I am thrashing at my circumstances trying to find a grip hold that I can latch my failures to, but with out success. When I come to the realization that it is my fault I'm failing this task is exactly the moment I pick myself up and try again. I have come to the realization that not much in my life has required a great deal of discipline. Life has come easy for me. I have spent most my life getting by on the talent God has given me and the community he has put me in. Instead, I should be willing to be a good steward of that talent and use the self-discipline that God has called me to. This is a hard lesson for me. I've seen myself as a hard worker all my life but being a hard worker and being self-disciplined are two very separate things. I love working hard for three reasons; the benefit of others, if I enjoy it, or if I get paid for it. Self-discipline by definition is none of those. It is for yourself, it is not enjoyable (or everyone would be disciplined), and you don't get paid for it. My motivation needs to be found elsewhere, something more eternal.
Today is a new day. I am up, dusting myself off and ready to fight the good fight again. Life threw me a curve ball, but it isn't what Life throws at you that makes you the person you are, it is how you respond. I quit my job at Rouxbarbeque to allow more time to study. I will not sacrifice Jesus time, working out and sleep anymore. Time to take this serious. I'm up to 248 pounds right now and it is time to do something about it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment